Am I Wasting My Life?

When I’m not busy working I feel like I’m wasting my life away. I program for a living, it’s a relatively well-paying job but from time to time I lose enthusiasm for what I do and procrastinate on my projects. During those times when I should be working but wasn’t I become anxious, feeling like I’m wasting away my life doing nothing.

I enjoy writing fiction, but sometimes I would sit down in front of the computer and I could think of nothing to write. (More often I have great ideas, but I had a hard time putting them into words.) During those times I feel like I’m wasting my life on a hobby, that instead I should be busy with work than this dream of becoming a writer.

Perhaps it’s an attitude that had been inculcated into me by my parents who were happy with me only when I was studying. We all have been told throughout our youths by our elders to dedicate as much time towards achieving something, and usually it means building a career. But is it really true that we are wasting our lives when we’re not working? Isn’t it usually the case that our lives really happen when we take a break from work?

Building relationships with the ones we love, spending time relaxing with friends, enjoying a good meal, lounging around in the living room, or simply enjoying the warmth of a bed on a cold night, those are not only moments that make life worth living, but those are the moments we consider our real life. Unless you have an awesome job or a very generous boss, you are unlikely to live just for the sake of having a job.

Perhaps I shouldn’t feel so terrible when I goof off at work, or couldn’t think of anything to write for the next chapter of my novel. Maybe it is time to get rid of the feelings of guilt when I do not achieve the goals I set for myself. Throughout my life my mentors have always told me that it’s important to set goals for my life. Why? Life is not a game where you play to earn the most number of points; life is a game where you can literally choose to do whatever you want.


2 thoughts on “Am I Wasting My Life?

  1. We all go through these moments when we wonder if we are doing the right thing in our lives. I didn’t have a midlife crisis but I had a quarter life one and then a 1/3 life one. Now that I’m middle age, I just don’t care and just enjoy life. You wrote a good post!!

    Liked by 1 person

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